There needs to be a way to opt to remove your post from hot/active.
It’s neither on the web?
I haven’t use the web page much I used connect and have since transitioned to boost.
Block the community?
I meant to proactively remove your own post from circulation. Communities that are for things that the stereotypical Lemmy user doesn’t agree with like the Christianity or Conservative one tend to get down voted by people outside the group even if the particular post is a good post for that community.
Ah, gotcha. Yeah, reddit had an option like that IIRC.
Can you link the post? Cant find it in the community…thanks
People downvote the weirdest shit for the weirdest reasons sometimes.
Where are you seeing the downvotes here?
Not 100%.
You can’t have 100% of the world agreeing with you.
You know… I don’t think I’m going to have a drink today.
I’m happy to hear that.
For anyone with a drinking problem who is hesitant to start AA:
-
They do not push religion on you. I thought they did, but they don’t.
-
It doesn’t work for everyone but it worked for my best friend - someone who I thought it would NEVER work for.
-
It can be a bit somber but it’s also a social gathering. I’ve seen meetings, they’re usually pretty upbeat
-
You are not a faker if you go to AA and still smoke weed. They don’t promote it but a lot of people do it regardless.
I still couldn’t do AA because even though it’s not “religion” they still push the higher power stuff. That it’s bigger than you and stuff. I never liked that because it takes the responsibility away from the person. To me, it’s both. It can be a disease that you have trouble controlling while also, you have to take responsibility and learn to manage it. For me I just had to stop and avoid going to bars and stuff. But I was also a social drinker, never drank alone so staying away helped me a lot. Of course others may be different.
There are less religious AA equivalents. I like https://recoverydharma.online/
Edit: also https://www.aasecular.org/, AA but without the focus on religion
That it’s bigger than you and stuff. I never liked that because it takes the responsibility away from the person.
You are free to conceptualise the higher power as your subconscious, or the genome, or whatever. As to responsibility: The flipside of that is shame: If, on the precipice of being well, you get hit by “oh am I stupid I did everything wrong I ruined my life it’s all my fault” you don’t want responsibility. You want acceptance.
…this thought brought to you by your friendly neighbourhood Stoic. I bring this up because the serenity prayer is actually 110% Stoicism:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.
May you have exactly that.
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
I asked him about the higher power stuff (he’s agnostic) and the way he described it got me on board. It’s one of the steps but, at least in his group, the focus was on “there are things that are simply out of your control” - in the context of guilt. Personal responsibility is the main focus.
If you’re just a social drinker I don’t think you’d benefit from AA anyway. It’s more for people who have a serious problem, not just a bad social habit
That sounds reasonable. When I tried it they put a lot of focus on the higher power stuff, but I imagine a lot depends on what group you’re in too.
If you’re just a social drinker I don’t think you’d benefit from AA anyway. It’s more for people who have a serious problem, not just a bad social habit
Oh, I wasn’t just a social drinker, I mean I only drank socially, never alone, but I could never stop. I would go out every night and drink til 6am and get belligerent. I’ve been sober for a long time now so I don’t need help. I was just talking about my AA experience years ago.
Ahh my bad I misinterpreted.
In high school I worked for the park district as a “building attendant” (basically cleaning up after events) and I was scheduled at AA meetings a lot. In my largely Christian hometown there was DEFINITELY a strong religious angle and it made me dislike AA for years. My friend attended meetings based out of a normal city, I’m sure that made a big difference
That definitely may have been the issue too. I was in the southern US at the time in a heavily Christian town too.
Pretty sure it started as a Christian organization but they’ve since dropped the strong connection as it was turning a lot of people off to it. They’re trying pretty hard to combat the stigma since young people are avoiding them. The average age of attendees has gone up by like a 15 years.
-
That’s the right thing to do
Downvoting wholesome posts is almost as bad as complaining about downvotes.
It’s also entirely possible that someone just really doesn’t like that such content exists. Stop drinking is meant as a support group for alcoholics. But it’s messaging sounds a bit like moral crusading against alcohol. And that sounds like the sort of thing someone scrolling through a front page would take objection to.
deleted by creator
Honestly I think we need more voting options. Some that I would think would expand on up/down votes:
I like this
I don’t like this but the content is good (think news articles delivering good journalism on bad news)
I don’t like this and don’t want to see more (irrelevant content to you)
I disagree with this post
Content is irrelevant to the community
Content is spam/harmful/etcThat’s obviously not what they would be called, but those are the feelings the votes should convey. And those can be expressed in a simple upvote downvote front to end users as well.
I like this and I don’t like this but the content is good both deliver upvotes
I don’t like this and don’t want to see more doesn’t do either, but tells the algorithm that you don’t want to see that stuff (I don’t even know if any fediverse stuff ranks with an algorithm.
I disagree and content is not relevant both downvote, and content is harmful both downvotes and reports in one action
and you could streamline it as a list of emote-like buttons that convey each of those options somehow. the binary good/bad that we have now has led to a non-trivial amount of people taking it way too personally or obsessing over the singular number - a lot of times it’s easy to go straight to thinking of the worst case scenario, and that way of thinking about social media usage exacerbates a lot of mental health issues that’ve been revealed in all those studies linking them (social media and mental health)
is this an elaborate joke
Pretending that votes mean any more than agree/disagree is just a delusion.
Meh, fuck the downvotes. Its an important daily post in an important community. I really enjoy the accountability it provides.
But is not gonna be for everyone. Most people are normies who are good with never drinking or only have one or two every few weeks at best.
Maybe they just want it off their homepage. Who knows?
Edit: And I saw it suggested elsewhere it could just be a misclick, which is very possible. Either way, just keep on keepin’ on!
Or people that drink much more often, see this post, and find it too confronting for themselves.
That makes me kinda sad actually, but the reality is, you could be right.
It’s a pretty hard thing to wrestle with the idea of sobriety if someone can’t imagine living their life that way. I get it. I’m a partier at heart who always wants to be out and about with people socializing, and the bar is the easiest place to gather other adults.
Hopefully if they are someone who wants to cut back, (and can do so safely), they take a peek in and see that it’s not meant to be judgey. If someone checks in for a day or two and not the next, no one is coming after anyone/shaming anyone/questioning anyone. Just come back the next time you don’t wanna drink. It’s that low threat and chill.
I’m a verbose individual so I write novels, but most folks are legit just like “Not drinking today”, and leave it at that. Whatever works, right?
Probably people who just didn’t want it on their feed and didn’t know how to block the channel.
Well ya, it’s not about Linux, FOSS, or hatred for cars. Lemmy only likes those things.
I mean, it’s at +4 and 83% upvotes. That’s just 5 upvotes and 1 downvote. There’s always that one guy.
Also probably a misclick
I’ve discovered many posts that I’ve managed to downvote without realising… I go through my profile every so often out of curiousity
Mis swipe too. I’ve swiped a comment past upvote into downvote before.
I don’t know about the community but it could be against the intention of the community.
Someone might disagree with the group nature of the proposed commitment. They might be thinking that social commitment dilutes the commitment to the self that’s the key factor in taking control of an addiction.
It’s foolish to always assume anyone who disagrees with your methods is an asshole looking to cause pain. Sometimes people just don’t think what you’re doing is going to work, and they want it to work, so that’s why they oppose the plan.
The app I manage gets a very small but steady stream of 1 star reviews that say “great app, thanks!”
I rarely use my dialing wand on the internet, so it takes me a few presses to get the right vote sometimes.
It’s the internet, so I’m not sure why anyone would be surprised.
I thought nicer people were on lemmy. 😔
I’m really sorry to contradict you, but I am NOT nice.
Yes you are! Don’t sell yourself short.
In fact, I heard Buddhariffic came second in the local niceness championship! Would have come first, but voluntarily gave the title to a guy who’d had a bad day and could use some cheering up!
There’s always going to be bad apples.
Nah, it’s the internet. Trolls are everywhere, unfortunately.
Was it posted in their own community or is it an advertisement for their community posted in another community?
If it was posted in the /stopdrinking community, that’s a bit bizarre (though possibly being voted on by people who happen to see it while browsing everything at once). But if it was in any other community as an ad, it would make a lot of sense.
That was the original post. I mod that community.
