Mine certainly hasn’t. I feel like I’ve had 27 years of downward spiral.
I’ve been slowly, but steadily collecting more and more people to miss, Watching my finances get worse and worse. My body is starting to fall apart. My life is boring, lonely and grueling. Every time I take a step forward in one area I take a step back in all the others. Therapy has been worse than useless, loved ones stop caring eventually, casual friends just disappear into the ether without a trace.
I wish I hadn’t gotten “lucky” during my previous suicide attempts, because I definitely can’t try that anymore. I wish someone could just do it for me, without me ever expecting it.
But your 30s are supposed to be easier. More stable. It’s hard to believe that’ll be the case for me, going into them with no connection to my past, no money, no marketable skills.
My teens were pretty fucked up so I guess life is a lot better for be now than it was, with that being said there’s still enough to worry about, enough to get angry about but also enough that makes it worth while and I think things are gonna get better, not because I’ll be older but because I’ll be more independent and hopefully wiser.
I’ve made two suicide attempts back then and honestly, I couldn’t tell you how I got out of that hole (my parents sure as hell didn’t help). I guess that I just wanted to do something out of that mess…