Mine certainly hasn’t. I feel like I’ve had 27 years of downward spiral.
I’ve been slowly, but steadily collecting more and more people to miss, Watching my finances get worse and worse. My body is starting to fall apart. My life is boring, lonely and grueling. Every time I take a step forward in one area I take a step back in all the others. Therapy has been worse than useless, loved ones stop caring eventually, casual friends just disappear into the ether without a trace.
I wish I hadn’t gotten “lucky” during my previous suicide attempts, because I definitely can’t try that anymore. I wish someone could just do it for me, without me ever expecting it.
But your 30s are supposed to be easier. More stable. It’s hard to believe that’ll be the case for me, going into them with no connection to my past, no money, no marketable skills.
My life is way better. But mental health is a never ending journey. I’ll always be one bad day away from death.
We’re all going to die sometime. Just trying to keep that number chugging along for as long as I can. I’ll be dead soon enough. Whether that’s next week or next century, it’s still soon enough. No need to rush it.