• MrsEaves@kbin.social
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    8 months ago

    The true tragedy is when you get all the social signals and you have the thought “man I wish I could just date multiple people at the same time” and it doesn’t occur to you to try that because… ???

    Now I’m old and have to work 1 1/2 full time jobs to pay my bills, so. That won’t be happening.

  • ivanafterall@kbin.social
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    8 months ago

    Was just realizing this morning that my ex-wife was clearly trying to signal interest in a threesome with another woman.

    Thanks for this and fuck my life.

    • kameecoding@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      those random realizations are the worst, like one day years later realizing that the proper response to a girl inviting you in for beer is not: “no thanks I have had too much yesterday” and then leaving

      • ivanafterall@kbin.social
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        8 months ago

        “Ahem, unlike those other normie assholes, I moderate my alcohol intake, thank you. (That’ll impress her…)”

        • Kühe sind toll@feddit.de
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          8 months ago

          Or do it like me. You can drink more if you drink at least the same amount of water. Of course this has its limitations. At some point drinking water just reduces the headache the next day but doesn’t makes you think clearly.

        • kameecoding@lemmy.world
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          8 months ago

          are you doing like a bit?

          it was after a beer marathon, previous day I drank 9 beers and passed out kinda

    • BolexForSoup@kbin.social
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      8 months ago

      The bedrock of a good relationship is communication. If she wanted to do a threesome, she should’ve just talked to you about it lol

      • ivanafterall@kbin.social
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        8 months ago

        Yeah, for sure. It was complicated. We are (friendly) exes for a reason. Nonetheless, it seems pretty clear in hindsight that I might’ve had a threesome with two Ukrainian women on several occasions had I not been so special and unaware and…it’s just really hard, y’know? It’s just really hard.

    • DefederateLemmyMl@feddit.nl
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      8 months ago

      This reminds me of the time I went home with a lesbian couple after a party, and not realizing they were interested in sex with me, even after dropping hints like repeatedly telling me things like: “You know, we’ve both been with men before”, then while awkwardly watching a movie on their couch they started to undress eachother and make out, and one girl pulling me in to touch her body as the other girl moved to perform cunnilingus on her.

      And all I could think was: oh wow I should probably give them some privacy now, I guess it’s time to go home.

  • jdf038@mander.xyz
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    8 months ago

    The replies in this thread make me feel better for being so oblivious in college.

    I still cringe at it but I’m glad I got past it. Again like many of you I don’t know how on earth I got married.

  • Narrrz@kbin.social
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    8 months ago

    or we just eyed each other from afar, but not obviously enough for the other person to notice, and never found an excuse to make closer contact.

  • Vilian@lemmy.ca
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    8 months ago

    you missed their flirting because you didn’t liked them enough, or they didin’t like you enough to say to you, or flirt until you take the hint

    source: my girlfriend has social anxiety and is shy asf, but she really showed it, and i’m a dumbass

    • halfeatenpotato@lonestarlemmy.mooo.com
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      8 months ago

      Nah, I’ve certainly had a few reflective moments where I realized my missed opportunities. The reality is, unless you’re really confident and self-possessed, it’s hard to put yourself out there. So I can understand why these guys didn’t just spell it out for me, cause they likely weren’t sure I was into them. And on my end, I always struggled with low self-esteem, so I just assumed that these attractive guys weren’t actually into me and were just being nice/good friends.

      Anyways, I’m glad your girlfriend is an exception to the rule.

    • MrsEaves@kbin.social
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      8 months ago

      Lady with social anxiety here to confirm. Flirting is useless. Every time I’ve just given up and asked the dude to date after being extremely forward for a while and they’re always shocked 🤷🏼‍♀️ Once we get past that, it’s great.

    • rotopenguin@infosec.pub
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      8 months ago

      You missed their flirting because a good portion of your highschool class discovered that the absolute funniest gag in the world is to “flirt” with you.

    • DefederateLemmyMl@feddit.nl
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      8 months ago

      you missed their flirting because you didn’t liked them enough

      More likely that you missed it because you didn’t like yourself enough to believe that they were sending out clear hints.

    • Custoslibera@lemmy.worldOP
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      8 months ago

      Oh I figured they were flirting only that this realisation occurred three months after the fact.

      I would have very much wanted to date them.

  • guyrocket@kbin.social
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    8 months ago

    One time. At band camp…

    In high school a friend of a very attractive popular girl asked me if I liked popular girl. I thought she was playing some kind of prank on me so I said no. It was not a prank. She really did like me. To this day I wish I would have said yes.

    • vacuumflower@lemmy.sdf.org
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      8 months ago

      There are many things further down the road to go wrong with attractive popular girls. 2 most catastrophic cases in my life are with those such as them.

      Admittedly I’m the one who mainly failed them due to misunderstandings and passiveness, but when a girl (being all that popular) is used to boys being rather active and competitive and social, and then you are here just cause she happened to like your looks, this may end painfully, for you more than for her.

      There are also cases from the post, only I may have noticed, just wouldn’t risk losing an existing good friendship for possible romance.

    • ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca
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      8 months ago

      One time a girl in my computer class kept asking me for help. She’d ask me to stand behind her and point to where she should click. She asked if the view was nice, which was weird since it’s just a computer screen. Eventually, she decided I should move her hand while it was still on the mouse. That happened a lot and I always thought “wow this girl really doesn’t get computers.”

      I was in my late 20s before I realized she wanted me to look down her top and touch her hand. She must have been thinking “wow this guy really doesn’t get women”

  • Punkie@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    In high school, we had a science fiction club. I was vice president in my senior year. A year after I graduated, I was hanging out with some fellow graduates and one of them said, “How come you hated Christine so much?”

    “Who?”

    “Christine Smith. The blonde girl?”

    “The blond girl who wore all those surfer shirts?”

    “Yeah. Whats so bad about her?”

    “Nothing. She was always so quiet. I barely remember her.”

    “Yeah, well she practically threw herself at you, and you treated her like she didn’t exist.”

    “She did?”

    “Yeah. We even tried to make it easy. We set her up at parties to talk to you, and you just acted like she wasn’t even there. You were so rude.”

    “I literally had no idea. I totally would have dated her.”

    “Yeah, well, too late. She got so depressed after you graduated, that she ended up dropping out of everything and tried to kill herself. Shes been hospitalized and her parents moved away to be with her. Like, couldn’t you gave even said hi? Just because you made vice president of the club didn’t mean you were better than her or something.”

    I literally had no idea.

    • macniel@feddit.de
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      8 months ago

      And then everybody clapped, question mark?

      Because if it were true, those colleagues were stupid AF not picking up that you weren’t picking up. Or that they tried to force the romance, clearly leading her into depression.

      So I call BS, sorry.

    • Mobiuthuselah@lemm.ee
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      8 months ago

      She didn’t get depressed because you didn’t talk to her, and she wasn’t interested in you because you were VP of the science fiction club in high school. It all just sounds so self important even if that’s not your intent.

  • EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    8 months ago

    Hell, I’m so socially inept that I interacted with girls in the past and then as they were leaving I was told that I did well at flirting with them, to which I responded with, “I was flirting?”

    • jasondj@ttrpg.network
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      8 months ago

      What is flirting but a good conversation with some complimenting and occasional teasing?

      I really wish when I was younger people hadn’t put the title of “flirting” on having a fun conversation with people of the opposite sex, and put it on the checklist of getting a date. If people had just said “be yourself and try to have fun”, around all intersections (and not just as cheesy dating advice when talking about the opposite sex) I probably would’ve been a lot more successful in forming relationships in my teenage years.

  • DreamButt@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Thinking about that time I comped a cute girl’s meal (she forgot her card and I had a line to the door). She came back after closing hours and knocked on the door. She was really greatful for me covering her meal and wanted to pay me back. I told her it was okay and then locked the door (without a further thought). She then stood there for a bit before leaving… Later a coworker came over and was like “dude, I think she wanted you to ask for her number.” You could hear the gears turning in my head after that