I think this is an excellent time to point out that curl quotes (“ ”) are what are typographically used for quotations and apostrophes and hash marks (" ') are what are used for feet and inches. So it would look something like:

“ 2"× 4’ ”

(Spacing is still a bit ugly, I’d kern me some quote marks)

This is pretty much what I said when I came out as asexual to my fam. To which my dad said, “so… you’re gay.” I shrugged and said yeah sure. I’d rather be labeled that than forced into comphet.