My new excuse is, “I only know linux, I don’t know anything about windows.”
Stare at their computer blankly
“Wait, they got rid of the green hill???”But that’s where I kept my emails. How do I get back to that hill?
“… don’t you have a cloud or something for going back to the hill ??”
(Actually, ever since NES, he had vaguely pictured computers as being related to the pipes in that Mario Brothers game)
I do that too but only because it’s much easier to help my relatives with Linux than those with Windows.
I even “convert” some people because Llinux is easier for them if I just manage it. I had a neighbor that was using Window on a very old computer, it was slow and choking under the weight of simple updates. Plus, she was always asking me why her computer kept rebooting by itself while it was obviously Windows update. So I installed Mint and all the problems went away.
Anyway I don’t want to have to deal with Microsoft accounts, licenses, office365, the general bloat, the ads, the new versions of Windows… I have enough at work, so if I am going to help on my free time, it has to be on the OS I find easier to deal with.
Pro tip: whenever a relative asks you to fix their computer, wipe everything and set up Linux for them. That’ll teach em.
Did that for my sister but nowadays I just use the excuse: “Sorry I can’t help you, I don’t use Windows anymore”.
The real problem is when a relative know that I’m computer guy and ask me to fix the TV/air conditioner or like my father once did: setup an antenna
I just tell them that I only deal with Linux and that is usually enough to dissuade.
,oh how glad, my ubuntu is broken since update"
Then it’s fun lol
Exactly.
Looks like we’re setting up an improvised KVM device! :D
Honestly no problem, if they’re tech literate enough to have gotten that far it’ll probably be okay
Legit haven’t touched windows in 5 years, I don’t know my way around it
I haven’t used Windows personally in about 15 years and professionally in about 10. I’m pretty useless on anything newer than XP. I even got my wife to switch over to a Mac Mini because at least that has a Unix-like OS and she can still do her audio work on it (in fact, better than a Windows system because their patch QA is light-years ahead of the MS “fuck it, it’ll break some systems but we’ll get that next patch Tuesday” approach).
That’s not to say that I like Apple. I just dislike their OS less than Windows.
You have experienced the pinnacle of Windows (we could probably also add Windows 7 to this). Do yourself a favor and never touch a Windows 10 and especially Windows 11 machine. It’s unimaginable how Microsoft managed to break everything that was working and how clever they are in terms of marketing to sell you stuff you don’t need.
They made me finally switch to Linux because my paid 365 subscription offered me to try the new outlook because Windows Mail was to be discontinued in future. I activated the test and the fun began: Only one of seven accounts was imported into outlook. Of course it was the only Microsoft account (Outlook). All other Accounts were ignored. I thought „Ok migration didn’t work, I’ll do it later manually“ I had a new email. I clicked on it. Edge opened although Firefox was my standard browser. It took me a couple of seconds to realize that I was clickbaited into opening an advertisement by one of the biggest companies on this planet.
This made me immediately stop my work and install Linux Mint. I’m not going back any time soon.
For job related reasons I have to use a lot of VMs. Unfortunately most of them are Windows 10. I created a naked installation years ago and basically use this as the base for individual development VMs. One of these annoyed me for days to make an update. All I could click was „remind me in one hour“ or update immediately. So I chose the one hour a lot of times. I finally let it update. Now my (Windows default!) task bar is transparent and also the whole windows menu. A colleague using the same VM with the latest updates (without changes to installed software) has no issues.
Did that, kind of. The system’s been running flawlessly for like a decade now. I’m not sure if they even understand the difference.
Or even better, install Emacs and run away laughing wildly! Bwahahahaha!
“You use Arch, now, btw”
“Make sure to write that down, because you’re legally required to bring it up at every possible opportunity.”
no uncle steve, that’s commuter science, I know ALL ABOUT PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION
No matter the degree or seniority, the answer is always NO.
“Right, so you see, when a conductor is passed through a magnetic field, an electromotive force is produced, and this force can perform work, which can in turn be used to represent probabilistic information…”
mashes the A button to skip dialog
HAHAAA YOU FOOL YOU HAVE ACTIVATED MY INFODUMP I AM AN UNSKIPPABLE CUTSCENE
What they say: “You know about computers, right?”
What they mean: “Can you fix this bug in Microsoft’s software?”“Brother, may i have some IT-Service?”
“No.”
1 in 10 CS majors fall for this common trap. The other makes this mistake at work.
The biggest career mistake I’ve ever made is opening an Excel macro and changing two characters to make it count a thing again.
I was then permanently labelled Cracks the Technomancer, master of all things technology. It fucking sucks.
Especially this time of year when people are panicking for whatever reason, people are travelling, people are coming and going, people are buying laptops, devices and phones and the majority of them don’t know how digital files or folders even work (or where they are in a digital system).
If you know anything about computers … just pretend you don’t know anything like everyone else. It will save you so much work and headaches this time of year.
And don’t get soft either … cute girl asking for help? NO … old grandma has a new laptop? NO … your dying relative has a new phone? NO! … your two year old niece has a new tablet? NO! … your drug dealer wants to lower your debt in exchange for fixing their PC? HELL NO!!!
your drug dealer wants to lower your debt in exchange for fixing their PC? HELL NO!!!
nuh uh, if i’m getting paid (getting paid in reduced debt is still paid cuz it’s money i was gonna give him anyway) i’ll do whatever
Yep that’s a contract and I work for those
i don’t really mind, but i also don’t do anything for free, either. at least feed and beer me.
tge moment when you don’t use windows for a few years now, yet your windows mates still ask you for help (i can pretty much always help em)
I was legally contracted to say yes.
At least it was satisfying to answer NO when the question involved their personal (not a company one) acer cheap mall laptop filled with mcafee, bloatware and socuh combined with the slowest low capacity hdd in existence.
Hell NO
Every year at Christmas my grandparent in law asks me to fix her iPhone. Something with iCloud account. The answer is always the same: Apple store.
Using Apple requires a PhD in computer science.
My answer is usually “I don’t use computers the same way you do, so I probably won’t know what you’re talking about.”
What’s a Cimproter?
