Absolutely Wallace. He looks like he prefers to work in dead silence - thumbs up.
Alternatively, he’s the type of old fart that constantly makes calls when they could’ve been emails.
And when it’s a message I bet it would be just Hi and nothing after that until you reply
AAAAAAAH
“Anything longer than a sentence deserves a phone call”
Never shuts up about how the country has gone to hell, complaining about “the queers”, etc, etc, etc.
He could be a union supporter though - in my experience of doing labor organizing, the younger folks are usually more pro-union, then there’s a dead zone of support from the Boomers, and then the really old folks are much more supportive because they grew up when unions were more of an active force.
If Wallace is down to organize, then I’d pick him and just take the risk that he’s got some shitty opinions that I’ll have to work through and re-educate him on.
Alternatively, may have a shitload of good jokes and all around pleasant person to work with. Its a mix with the elderly. The sharp ones are awesome sometimes
Gotta be careful with that. I shared an office with an old guy once and had to bring headphones. We wouldn’t talk, but he would constantly make old man noises. Coughs, grunts, snorts, etc. If I didn’t block them out, they would drive me crazy like nails on a chalkboard. That said, the guy himself was really cool and I loved working with him otherwise.
‘Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes.’
I’d be fine with several of these.
Brice: I’ve never understood people’s distaste for that smell. I won’t microwave tuna in an office because I know others don’t like it, but it wouldn’t bother me.
Wallace: probably has some great stories, but also likely wants to shut up and get things done. Great combination if handled correctly.
Shiloh: hey, you can play anything on your headphones, I’m cool with that. But if you want to play stuff on speaker it’s only fair that we play 50/50. (My secret: I could totally do up to 75% Radiohead)
Dayzie: again, not a smell that tends to bother me.
Shiloh looks like she’d be the most fun to hang with.
Anyone but Brice, tbh.
- Idk what’s supposed to be bad about getting engaged
- Everyone farts
- I like Radiohead
- Natural deodorant works fine for a lot of people
- Most people I’ve known who do crossfit have been very aware that talking about it is a meme
- Dudes who are super old and still working tend to be fun
- HR folks have a lot ot useful info for getting the most out of your employment
Edit: I will decline Wallace, too, actually. As fun as he might be, at 100 there’s a pretty good chance he’ll die on the job and I don’t wanna deal with that.
It says “is like 100”, not “is 100”, so that just means something like
> your own age * 1.33
I’m not sure id have a problem with any of these honestly.
What an HR thing to say
/s
I mean, we’re going on no information but one data point. Certainly hr is up there on odds to have some issues. But I’m at a work place were people generally get along well.
Same, dude. I was about to say, I’d hang with all of these people in an open space office. Seems like a perfectly okay group. Wallace might… have some generational gaps in the conversation department. But only might. He might be totally cool.
Ya gotta be able to talk with almost anyone, right? Be nice and act interested by asking some basic questions, and we might actually become interested once we get to know someone.
God knows it doesn’t always pan out that way – some people are just boring af – but… At least we tried, hey.
Anyone from HR will probably be on the phone a lot.
Wallace. Bet he’s seen some shit.
Wallace.
Torn between Wallace and Lewis. They’re both farters, but one wears headphones. Maybe Wallace will take me to steak at lunch.
I eat an insanely high protein diet and I crossfit regularly… “I’m not locked in here with you, You’re locked in here with me!”
Wallace. In a heartbeat. Cause if someday he doesn’t have one, I’ve got my own office!
Finally the voice of reason. And until then I got an extra cool Grandpa figure in my life to tell me goofy stories.
Monkey paw: he’s a raging maga
Hannah: Get her to invite me to the wedding, meet her friends and all the social circle. Very helpful to grind that social experience
Caleb: dude is probably shredded and knows not only how to eat healthy, but, by comparison, will force you to eat healthy as well. Probably can help with grinding the social experience as well
Wallace: if you get him to open up and share his work experience, this could be the teaching of a lifetime. Also helps to grind the social experience as he probably has young nephews, and family gatherings to invite you
These 3 are my best choices
Who gets an office anymore. I though it was all hotdesking bullshit
Sharing your hotdesk, at the same time.
Shiloh all the way.
If he only listens to radiohead, why’s he got a gary numan shirt on?
I find it very funny that there’s like a 50/50 split between people who see Shiloh as male vs female
Poser
Good point, I didn’t catch that
On a somewhat related note, does anyone else find Radiohead a bit insufferable? Their entire discography seems to be aimed at angsty 14 year olds with first world problems:
Creep - Oh no, my love interest finds me weird.
No surprises - Boo hoo I live a comfortable middle class existence, woe is me.
Wolf At The Door and Knives Out get a pass for cool music videos and genuinely disturbing lyrics.
Ah the scenarios we are forced to imagine with back to office mandates. I’ll go with Dayzie because we have similar ideologies about deodorant and I can’t wait for someone to complain to Susan so I can be oppositionally defiant.
Susan. Make friends with HR. Get your folder marked, “promote ahead of peers”.
Nah ACAB. (Hr are cops in my head cannon)
My wife is the admin Spock. In her last job, she knew the bosses were unreasonable and was willing to cover for the employees more or less (some were jerks or incompetent. They didn’t last long.)
Though generally, if upper management does something outright scandalous or outright illegal, HR usually helps cover it up. I don’t think she’d be willing to cover sexual assault, but she did had to cover up grift by clients.
Just remember that Rule of Acquisition #48 always applies when dealing with HR:
The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife!
Wallace.
Dude just wants to shut up and work, make it to retirement. You could probably engage him about his grandkids or his fishing trip if you wanted.
All the rest of them are gonna want to bother you with their problems or hobbies.
