It’s not true, folks. The lying liberal media wants you to think he’d shag a settee. That he’d bone a book stand. That he’s creamied on the credenza.
Don’t trust them. My beautiful boy JD, he’d never do it! He’s chaste with the chaises. He’s never loved a loveseat.
My VP would never fuck furniture.
I would actually be surprised if he releases anything of value. Trump refused to release his taxes, and emulating Trump’s destruction of democratic norms is a base-ante show of fealty right now.