til flatulists exist. made my day.
I looked up what flatulists are, and I’m happy to announce that I have found my dream job.
Performance anxiety and stage fright would do me in personally.
Depending on your response to anxiety, those could be performance enhancing
Id overcommit and shit my pants in front of the king
Imagine 20 years on, he’s an established country gentleman, married with grown children, and he still has to ride to court every Christmas to fart for the king.
Man, things really were a bore before radio huh?
it was genuinely so fucking boring that people were more than happy to give any visiting traveller free food and housing so long as they told some stories and news, you could straight up live your life as a travelling storyteller because everyone was so dreadfully desperate for some entertainment.
I mean that is still the case now with celebrities, just the “give them stuff” now is outsourced.
Imagine farting so good, it’s your profession.
“What do you, Steve?”
“I am a flatulist.”
“Oh you play the flute?”
“More like a tuba…”
“I am the instrument”
“… so, you’re a singer”
“I’m a singer doing a handstand”
This is the kind of material the king is looking for. How are your farts?
I have more impressive talents than that. I can haz house please?
To be fair I think this talent may be firmly in 'you had to be there territory.
One Jump, One Whistle, One Fart
Didn’t George Thorogood cover that song?
I wonder how to measure farts. What makes a good fart? The length, loudness, smell or just that you can do it at command?
I’d say that the ability to fart on command would take the proverbial cake.
Well, there are two schools of thought. Smell vs Sound.
I wonder if he was lactose intolerant. Either way, he found a way to monetize it.
Last week, I was watching a live taping of a comedy podcast, where a couple of journalists tell crazy stories from history.
They were doing the story of serial scammer, Frank Abergnale, aka the guy Leonardo DiCaprio plays in Catch Me If You Can. The problem with this story is that Frank Abergnale might be full of shit in his own right, as the only source for much of his story is based on his self-biography, which is very likely not true.
The hosts take turns researching and telling the stories, while the other one listens. This week, the storyteller was the lactose intolerant guy. So, because he knew his story was gonna be a lot of bullshit, he had brought a packet of 18 cheap cheeses. So if the listening host got a whiff of this being a lie, he would be able to call bullshit, and the storytelling host would have to eat one of the cheeses as punishment on behalf of Mr. Abergnale.
All this to say that this comment made me realize, we still have jesters and flatulists today. We just call them comedians and podcast hosts.
I can’t decide if Abergnale making everything up makes him a lesser scammer or even better than we thought.
My ancestor?
What’s the musical symbol for a vibrato on that instrument?
The same as the symbols for the other end of the tube.
You add a ~ above the note
Notable flatulists: two Brits and a French. I dunno you, but they seem full of shit.
Actually being full of shit is probably bad for your career as a flatulist.
Or good, depending on how gross the king is
Where can I learn this power?
Google Mr. Methane.
Learn the forbidden art and secure your plot of land from King Charles.
“Roland, King Henry’s farting jester” 🎵
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