Halfway through the web of social connections, I was expecting this to end like that old doctor riddle or some sort of logic puzzle where you have to identify people from a set of linked clues.
This really does read like a high school word problem.
People really use this awful font as their default??
Kevin is the man my cunt cheryl has been having an affair with
Sheryl does.
Bring back comic sans!!
I’ve started sneaking it into change controls with whatever snarky tone I can muster…
I think some old phones defaulted to it
What??
Phones from ancient Egypt.
Just like aunt Sheryl.
Unless my family members willingly chose it…
Bad news, mate
If someone ever tried to show me something on their phone and they have some weird font I just run. What they’re showing is likely going to scar me emotionally and is likely very crazy
Much as I don’t like to judge people on fonts, this one reeks of psychopath.
I think it matches the content in this case 😅
It makes it easier to read if you have something like dyslexia
man I don’t have dyslexia and this is much easier to read than something like arial
I think you might have dyslexia
no it’s not that
Yes it is, you’ve been diagnosed by an internet stranger so please just accept your fate and hstu eht ufck pu
I diagnosed myself yesterday after seeing that Goth Clown meme, I looked at that stupid meme several times throughout the day before realizing it was a Cloth Gown. I know now for certain that I am dyslexic. I’m going to get a medic alert bracelet, just in case I’m found unconscious
I don’t think dyslexia requires… hm. Nevermind.
Should be using Papyrus
or Comic Sans
At least comic sans is legible
There’s a comic I follow on IG (candy hearts I fhink) that uses papyrus to troll people. Lol
I know what you did…
I KNOW WHAT YOU DIIIDDDDDD!!!
Watching that skit never ceases to get a genuine laugh out of me. I’m literally gonna go watch it right now lol
Might be their best one ever
Hey finally someone got the reference!!
Wingdings is where it’s at
Did they take a bag of popcorn to thanksgiving? Because, I’m getting ‘they took a bag of popcorn to their mom’s thanksgiving diner’ vibes here.
Any follow up?
Unfortunately none. Absconded with this several years back and don’t even remember where.
To be a fly on that wall.
No fly could stick to that wall because it doesn’t exist
Damn shame, because that’s some good popcorn material.
Found this on Bing
Kevin came later than Aunt Sheryl and her husband. I am sitting, waiting patiently. As Kevin walks into the room, Aunt Sheryl looks horrified and goes completely silent. Her husband asks if everything is okay and greets Kevin courteously. Throughout dinner, my aunt acts super suspicious and Kevin acts uneasy too. Her husband, bless his stupid soul, doesn’t see any of this and starts actually bonding (the stupid man!). Soon after we finish dinner, we all decide to drink some beers and watch the game. Aunt Sheryl complains of a headache and retreats to the guest bedroom. Kevin also wants to leave but Aunt Sheryl’s husband goads him into staying for a bit longer. Kevin reluctantly agrees.
The husband trusts his wife and doesn’t make a big deal about some awkwardness and tries to be inviting to a new-comer. Instead of always accusing his wife of having an affair everytime they meet a new man. It’s a lose-lose for this fellow
I thought u/shittymorph came with us for a second.
I’m probably just yelling into the void but…
Hey @shittymorph did you make it?
There’s a potential imposter here somewhere. I thought the real shittymorph retired shortly before hell broke loose on the site-that-must-not-be-named
Who’s shittymorph?
Back on the site-that-must-not-be-named, u/shittymorph would wander subreddits randomly and drop a comment that seemed relevant, but devolved into a diatribe about a 1998(?) pro wrestling match in which The Undertaker threw Mankind off the top of Hell in a cell, 16 feet into an announcers table.
Damn, I feel like I just channeled him to write that comment.
Thanks king
Dear internet: please be a true story.
Do you only watch non-fictional tv amd movies?
Wouldn’t Aunt Sheryl happen to have ruined the poster’s relationship by marrying her husband?
There’s so much to unpack here.
A and B and C and D are going to a destination E.
A and B are having an affair. C is being cheated on. D is planning on enjoying the act of torturing A B and C
I knew those unions and sets would come in handy one day.
I might be able to come up on with a less direct way of telling the story than the original post, but it would take effort.
Hmmm according to set theory it sounds like uncle is gonna fuck Kevin but idk I never learned set theory
I really have to play more chess
I joined chess club in school and I lost in 3 moves at the first tournament. I learned at a young age that chess is not my game.
Damn, poor Kevin. It doesn’t sound like he deserves this 🙁
Fuck Aunt Sheryl… But I wish Kevin could have been spared.
I’m sure Kevin will bounce back. It’s a new relationship. Not like it’s been going on for years. Hopefully the uncle doesn’t beat him up.
My brain just melted out of my ears
That reads to me as if it could have blown up at anytime anyway. I think her doing only accelerated the inevitable.
i could feel my braincells commit suicide as i read this
Good morning! Fuck everything about this.
