• MamboGator@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I never understood this debate. Of course a woman would feel safer with a large gay man at her side.

      • NoIWontPickAName@kbin.earth
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        6 months ago

        I mean, as a dude, I damn sure would feel safest around lesbians if I was worried about that.

        Idk what like the girl animal “equivalent” of a bear would be, except one that I am not quite sure if it is offensive or not.

        Fucking queer is super accepted now, but then I watch my daughter, who has dated women before, and is not shy or ashamed, and I do believe is still fine with doing so in the future, call her brother or someone on YouTube gay as an insult.

        • Mrderisant@midwest.social
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          6 months ago

          The current “equivalent” I’ve seen is would you rather share your emotions with a tree or a woman.

        • GiveMemes@jlai.lu
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          6 months ago

          I’m bi and call stuff I don’t like ‘gay’ all the time. I also call stuff I like ‘gay’. I don’t think that the use of a term by those it applies to can really be negative as its more of an empowerment thing abt takibg the word back for the community. It’s like getting mad at people that call each other the n-word (especially if you aren’t black yourself).

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      That’s because it wasn’t meant to be a debate, it was meant to illustrate a point.

      People who didn’t get it and people who did get it but didn’t like it (i.e. misogynists) turned it into a debate. The latter also proved that point with the large number of rape and death threats.

      • The_Terrible_Humbaba@slrpnk.net
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        6 months ago

        Yeah, god forbid people get angry when others make sexist remarks! They must be real misogynists for not liking sexism!

        If you replaced the “man” with “black man” or “black person”, or if someone said this with immigrants, it wouldn’t need to be explained to you or anyone why this is a pretty fucked up thing to say, but for some reason when it’s just “man” it’s okay and anyone who disagrees is a misogynist, according to you. If I made a general frustrated remark about women, plenty of people would take issue with it, and I don’t think you’d would be saying “it wasn’t meant to be a debate, it was meant to illustrate a point”, would you?

        How about just stop using sexist rhetoric? There are a lot of people on your side who would agree with you if you just dropped the needlessly sexist and divisive rhetoric.

        And before you get there - and if not you then I’m sure someone will think of saying it - yes, it’s true that the world and system we live in isn’t as hostile to men as women, but progressive spaces definitely tend to be the opposite. And believe it or not, that actually has an effect with pushing younger men into the arms of the alt right; you can insult them and just call them fascists if you like, but that doesn’t change the reality that young hormonal men going into progressive spaces and seeing this kind of rhetoric will feel excluded, pushed out, and like the world is against them.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          See above re: people didn’t get it.

          By the way, what is “my side” and what would they agree with me about?

          • The_Terrible_Humbaba@slrpnk.net
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            6 months ago

            Gr8 argument m8!

            Should be pretty clear if you actually bothered to read it, but I’ll spell it out for you: P-R-O-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E-S; and overall people who acknowledge the experiences of women that this is supposed to highlight. And I am also on that side, I just think you’re doing an absolute shit job of it, being needlessly discriminating, and creating division - as I already explained.

            • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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              6 months ago

              Okay, how would you illustrate this that wouldn’t cause a huge amount of controversy and misogyny?

              • The_Terrible_Humbaba@slrpnk.net
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                6 months ago

                By just highlighting the experiences of women in the society we live in, and all the sexual violence they fall victims to, and how much violence is specifically directed at women - without resorting to cheap inflammatory “memes” (*). And as another way to a solution, we can also just try to be and create good role models for young men.

                (*)And saying that has actually reminded me, that’s usually exactly how the far right likes to act and spread their message too: inflammatory rhetoric that can make a catchy sound bite that will reach a lot of people, but which has no real depth to it. I’d rather not those tactics and actually try having real conversations.

                  • The_Terrible_Humbaba@slrpnk.net
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                    6 months ago

                    What are you talking about? When did I even say anything like that? Of course they will still get threats, the point is what is the best way to move forward, raise attention to these issues to bring about a better society, instead of making the situation worse, which is what I think your behavior does.

                    I’m really not sure if you’re even engaging in good faith and I’m not gonna spend all day on this, so this will be the final thing I’ll say:

                    I think that meme is unnecessarily divisive and will cause the average man (at least young man/teenager) who stumbles into it to feel attacked, and even more so when accused of either “not getting it” or “being a misogynist”; and in a time when they are just a couple clicks away of falling into and alt-right pipeline that will acknowledge their feelings and tell them the left/progressives have it out for them, it’s really unproductive to use rhetoric like that, which can make them feel “othered” and part of an out group.

                • homicidalrobot@lemm.ee
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                  6 months ago

                  You should look into the origin of the word meme. It’s not terribly old and you clearly don’t understand it. You’ve also gone and thrown away your benefit of the doubt by arguing semantics on what’s clearly meant to be a lighthearted and hyperbolic comparison. Propping up random ideas and putting them, as words, in someone else’s mouth is dumb as hell. Pretty sure there’s hundreds of places online where you can argue with other people who don’t know the difference between socratic and aristotelean logic.

                  • The_Terrible_Humbaba@slrpnk.net
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                    6 months ago

                    You managed to say a lot without really saying anything. And when did I argue semantics or put words in someone’s mouth?

                    I’m not gonna go through this entire conversation again, so I’ll just link you my last comment which should sum up my thoughts relatively well.