Look, I’m just setting my rent according to an analysis of the current market rate for similar properties.

Yes, that analysis is provided by the same company that does estimates for the other properties.

No, I’ve never heard of “price fixing”. Look, your avocado toast is super expensive and it’s cuz the government gave you $600 three years ago so PAY MY MORTGAGE ALREADY YOU EASILY REPLACEABLE COW IN A PEN.

Haha, it was just a joke!

Unless… 👉👈

I mean, haha!

Unless…?

His last wish:

“I want one of my inventions to finally do something good for the world!”

choking noises

Not only invented them, but poisoned the hell outta himself trying to prove they were safe.

And then when he was too bedridden to do anything, he invented an automated bed to help him move around and strangled himself to death in the ropes.

Truly an inspiration.

loose an afternoon

That’s alright. A chiropractor can tighten up that afternoon for ya.

as megaprojects expert Bent Flyvbjerg explains in the following article, these grandiose projects operate by an iron law: over budget, over time, over and over again

Performance data for megaprojects speak their own language. Nine out of ten such projects have cost overruns. Overruns of up to 50 percent in real terms are common, over 50 percent not uncommon. Cost overrun for the Channel Tunnel, the longest underwater rail tunnel in Europe, connecting the UK and France, was 80 percent in real terms. For Boston’s Big Dig, 220 percent. The Sydney Opera House, 1,400 percent. Similarly, benefit shortfalls of up to 50 percent are also common, and above 50 percent not uncommon.

https://www.cato.org/policy-report/january/february-2017/megaprojects-over-budget-over-time-over-over

There will never be anything more illustrative of the limits of human intellect than the fact that a master logician famously argued that:

I ought to do XYZ because there may be an omnipotent being that rewards doing XYZ

…and did not immediately think:

I ought not to do XYZ because there may be an omnipotent being that punishes doing XYZ

That presumes I’m a fan of myself.

But they were, all of them, deceived, for another ring was made.

No joke, there are billionaires scouring the futurist community looking for a reassuring answer to that question.

Douglas Rushkoff wrote a whole book about it.

https://rushkoff.com/books/survival-of-the-richest-escape-fantasies-of-the-tech-billionaires/

Apparently they verbatim copy-pasted from a dictionary.

As a midwesterner, I never call a waiter because I don’t want to bother them.

The p in jpeg stands for “photographic”.

So… “jay-feg”?

And Starship Troopers got people really excited about space fascism.

Those yellow things poking through his suspenders aren’t buttons…

Thank you for contacting technical support.

It appears you’re having a problem with HUMOR.EXE.

You seem to have enabled LIP (Laughter Integrity Protection) Service.

You should know that LIP Service does not apply to built-in protocols such as TAB/00, and will cause compatibility issues in certain deployment environments such as EARTH.ENV.

To solve your particular issue, you’ll want to navigate to the /ASS directory, right-click on HEAD.ZIP and select “Extract”.

Am I the only one that gets a nails-on-chalkboard feeling from “how it looks like”?

It’s either “what it looks like”, or “how it looks”. Not some amalgamation of both.

People started downvoting this before I got here, and now it’s funny to me, so I also downvoted. Sorry.

¯\(ツ)/¯

Together with the hat, giving off mad “invisible man” vibes.

They’re camping the ghosts. Implying that the kids are about to die.