Pedophiles in the olympics, our strange toilets with the “poop shelf”; I just can’t win today.
Edit: it’s so you can inspect it. How is everyone else inspecting their poo?
I think for most people it’s kinda a shit n forget situation. As soon as I have dropped the load I want to disown it and forget it faster than you can say “shit”. You know just like pa did it.
Gotta make sure that toilet plume(Google it) is aimed up between the legs!
Yeah but where’s your poop knife?
The mashitty?
That’s what the three shells are for.
Pfffffffff he doesn’t know how the three shells work!
Wait, so I’m not supposed to throw them at other cars in traffic?
Well, I’d never want to rain on someone’s parade.
Lob away!
I’m still trying to understand which of the three shells is the correct one to use as a poop knife
All 3 held between the fingers, with a punching action.
That brings up a question; if Wolverine claws at a poop and retracts his claws, does the poop get wiped off by his gloves and skin or does the poop go into his forearm?
These are the important questions that need to be addressed. We cannot let this go unanswered by the creators.
We all are. It’s one of the bonds that keeps civilization alive. Keep searching !
ah, je mean de poop clogs?
It sure does.
aaah I get this reference
What if I don’t want to observe my turd on an elevated toilet bowl pedestal every time I take a shit?
You have to do the ‘ol’ push ‘n flush and hope you got the timing down.
Turns out your shit sitting exposed on a dry shelf smells exponentially worse than when it drops into water. Anyone still using these toilets in the 21st century is a psychopath.
You seat on it reverse.
The fact that it’s called “reverse” makes it clear that it’s not intended to be used that way and is thus stupid.
You’d be shit out of luck
Story time: I once briefly lived in a place that had an old toilet bowl like this. You can still find them in older houses. One day I took a massive shit and then found out that the flush wasn’t strong enough to get it down from there. And there wasn’t a brush. Yikes. Just wanted to share that with you guys.
So what did you do next? I’m thoroughly invested in the story
Got a bucket of water to flush it. After that I always had the bucket ready before starting the business. Luckily I didn’t stay there very long.
Origami toilet brush made from toilet paper. Yikes
Did you use the poop knife?
I came here to reference this, great work.
The trick is to put 3 pieces of toilet paper in beforehand, that way the whole shitboat can float away.
Actually? Or are you joking?
Actually. Source: We has this style of toilet at my parents house.
I like to imagine the shitboat floating away in flames like an epic Viking burial.
Try eating more hot sauce
My shits at my grandma’s would’ve been more comfy had I known this. I was always worried it wouldn’t flush (which happened on occasion).
You wrap Your hand in toilet paper and give it a little push. That’s what toilet paper is for.
Usa drops kids off at pool, the dutch stack shelves.
So your shit just piles up on the upper part till it kisses your asshole?
It’s a solid way to prevent neptunes kiss.
The downside is getting your balls slapped with a turd.
No kink shame ;)
Um… if you’re holding on to that much shit, you may want you see a doctor.
You’ve clearly never seen an American eat. 3 triple burgers, a large fry, and a milkshake is the standard dinner while dieting.
People who downvoted you are weak stomached non Americans
I’m sure those who down voted shame their ancestors by leaving food on their plate.
Based. Source: American. Downvoters could never handle Taco Bell
I have some experience with these. The only problem is that as the vertically standing excrement begins to collapse forwards, there is a chace for it to keep contact and drag its top portion across, from your anus towards the front. You can avoid this with a maneuver, pulling yourself up and slightly forward, right after the singular vertical log begins losing contact with the excretion area.
This is not a joke
Give this person an honorary degree in Turd Dynamics. Have you considered publishing your findings in the journal Nature?
Turdonomy AND Turdology, a double threat!
A.k.a. “Logology.”
The Real Deuce of studies.
Haven’t you thought of shitting in a backwards sitting position?
I prefer the kiss of poseidon over the casualities of deforestation
It’s trying to touch your balls isn’t it…?
The Great Mighty Poo’s Knight
I haven’t had a nice log come out in decades. Enjoy them while you can.
Calcium carbonate anti-acids tend to make good logs.
Males need 37g of fiber daily for optimum health. That’s the equivalent of 568g of raspberries or 657g of green peas or 1,154g of broccoli. Might wanna start taking some psyllium husk so you don’t get ass cancer.
If your diet is so lacking in fiber that you need to take pills to make up for it, fix your damn diet.
Don’t take the pills - the serving size on them is very misleading. You’dhave to take a ton of them to have any effect. Gotta go with the powder.
Nothing wrong with supplementation! It’s hard to eat that much fiber (even if your diet is good) due to the relatively low fiber density of most foods. We adapted to our food sources, not so much the other way around - and we don’t spend all day chewing on fibrous, foraged plants anymore. Plus, psyllium husk is a food. It’d be the same as eating a shitload of flax or something but with fewer calories.
So you eat half a kilo of raspberries, and then the rest of your diet is a juice cleanse? Here an example diet: oats for breakfast (6 g), a sandwich loaded with greens for lunch (4 g), chili for dinner (15 g). Throw in an apple for a snack (5 g). It’s really not that hard.
The National Academy of Medicine recommends:
• Women 51 and older: 21 grams of fiber per day
• Men 51 and older: 30 grams of fiber per dayNow your numbers go with 45 g per day, but honestly that example diet would leave me hungry. I’d probably also have a peanut butter and banana sandwich (7 g). Throw in a small amount of berries or raisins into the breakfast oats and we’ve hit your higher target.
Fair enough! I can be a little harder to hit consistently in practice depending on the level of variety in your diet, if you go out occasionally, etc. In my opinion and personal experience, anyway. But that is a solid and reasonable meal plan without a doubt.
The raspberries example was more an example of if one were to “fibermax” as the kids will be saying in 20yrs. Trying to most efficiently achieve the RDA with the most fiber dense foods possible - not intended as an actual, reasonable diet.
37g is still low. A good target to aim for is 100g.
How many weetabix biscuits?
Looks like they are 3.8g per 2 biscuit serving? So like 19.5 biscuits or around 370g.
It gives you the opportunity to examine it. I think that is the reason for the design.
“hey Sharon, SHARON GET IN HERE YOU GOTTA SEE THIS! SHARON!”
And to savour the undiluted aroma.
It kisses goodbye your asshole. Don’t forget from whence thy sheit falls.
The real problem is your turds are exposed to open air the whole time, so the smell fucking awful the whole time.
We referred to it as the poop shelf on our last visit.
Decades ago we called this the poop shelf as well.
My brother and I called it the inspection shelf as a joke. Turns out that’s what it’s actually for.
You should see the Dutch Oven….
For an extra 5€ I’ll show you a Dutch Trombone
I’m confused, isn’t this a better spot for the drain hole? When you sit facing the wall? So you have a shelf for your comic books and chocolate milk?
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I’ve blasted this all over Reddit back in the day and now I’ll blast it here: HOW OFTEN ARE THE DUTCH COLLECTING THEIR STOOLS THAT THEY NEED THIS KIND OF TOILET IN EVERY HOUSEHOLD? THEY USE IT EVERY DAY AND NOT JUST AT A DOCTOR’S OFFICE OR A HOSPITAL WHERE YOU WOULD THINK THAT STOOL SAMPLES WOULD BE COLLECTED OFTEN.
To this day no one has ever given me a reasonable believable explanation that makes sense. I’d be happy to hear that “all the greedy corporate toilet makers didn’t want to change their design to save money and now we’re all stuck with this dumb toilet blah blah blah” or “we Dutch folk have a special device to sit on that you don’t see in this picture that makes the design of this toilet sensible” or even “we simply love looking at a big stinky pile of s*** every time we take a dump you wouldn’t understand we’re Dutch”
I stayed in hotels and motels in the Netherlands and they all had the stupid toilet and it stanks so bad and they don’t believe in ventilated bathroom so you just have to open a window and smell it and your wife and kids have to smell it too. it’s so dumb.
Ah, touché
It looks like it’s designed to soak your balls if you flush mid-poop. I’m not into this.
I understand the Dutch may have different tastes, though.
Edit: if you go about things butters style, you’ll get an unhealthy butthole douching.
We had these here as well and i have no idea. The only thing i ever heard that made sense was it was easier to take stool samples. That makes some sense, but why would every household need them?
How else are you supposed to flush your nuts
Just sit facing the wall.
That way you can use the shelf for your chocolate milk and comic book
German toilets are like that too.
Comments on toilets of France, England, and Germany by Slavoj Zizek: https://youtube.com/watch?v=8mtZmBvat4k
Another good bit (not in the video) is that Zizek thinks that’s why Germans can endure great pain and sacrifices for an ideal…if you are strong enough to observe your shit for health reasons, there’s nothing you can’t do!
French toilets are BIS. Large, deep bowls with great pressure and a second commode for the greatest modern invention, the bidet. The French don’t fuck around with their shit.
I had these in a few houses in Germany. I call them trophy shelf toilets.
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Germans call a lot of things weird names
Did you have the light switch outside the bathroom too? That way your friends can make you poop in the dark
Of course.
Still better than a light sensor in a communal bathroom… outside of the stalls. That’s how it is at my workplace. If I spend a bit too long pooping, and nobody else comes in to poop at the same time, I end up in the dark. Then when I have to wipe, I have to either risk opening the stall door and wave into the room, with my dirty ass hanging out, hoping nobody happens to enter the bathroom at that time, or wait patiently for someone to come in and reactivate the light. Makes me wonder how blind people check their wiping: do they go on flavor or smell?
Haha, buy some of those super cheap pop lights for closets and use double-sided M3 tape to put one inside every stall 🤣👍🏻
Surely you mean poop lights?
Or turn the flashlight on your phone on
Or EDC a Warrior 3 and turn on THE SUN…but nah, I was going for the commentary of the lights being installed more than the actual function of them.
Oh, is that not a thing some places? I think the majority are outside here in the UK, generally electricals are not allowed inside the bathroom (although I’m not sure this actually covers light switches as I’m sure some of them are in there…)
I thought the pull-string light switch inside the bathroom was the standard in the UK?
I’ve only seen switches outside bathrooms in the last 5 years, in recent “having the bathroom re-done” cases.
It might be an age of house or regional thing though.
PICK-PONGGG….
I think it’s against electrical code. You can have a pull string because the wires are on the ceiling which carries the same risk of getting water in it as the light itself that is also on the ceiling. A wall switch would be lower on the wall and has the risk of wet handed people coming directly in contact with it
Sometimes you’ll see those “shavers only” sockets in bathrooms, which are different from your typical wall outlets in that they have a GCFI (also called RCD), and/or a built in fuse to limit current, and have a floating ground.
The light switch and light is likely tied to a “live loop” system which runs 230V, and has a 5 or 6 amp non-GCFI breaker on it. That is considerably more dangerous for a wet human to come in contact with.
In the US, it’s extremely rare to have a light switch outside if yhe room with the light. Usually there’s a lights witch and a couple sockets in the bathroom by the mirror.
Lol I’m in the states, but one of my friends houses had this “feature” growing up. I definitely turned the light off on him a few times. To top it off, this bathroom had no windows so it got fucking dark in there. It wouldn’t even work today, everyone has phones w them now n would just use that after you turned it off. Kids these days…
I’ve never had to deal with this, but I always plug in those blue glow night lights in the bathroom so they don’t crash into things when I go to take a piss in the middle of night.
